Yesterday I received a message from a woman which simply read, “Susan, what do you do when you doubt the very existence of God?”
Before I share with you what I shared with her, allow me to set the scene.
I had been sitting in front of my blank computer screen for what seemed like an eternity. I had no idea what God wanted me to write about for my weekly blog. So, like I always do, I simply asked, “God, what do you want me to share today?”
Within a minute, my phone chimed to alert me that I had a message. I read her question and just chuckled to myself. Then, I said out loud, “Really God, THIS is what you want me to share?”
I quickly wrote back to her. I gave her my phone number and said, “Please call me, as I cannot possibly tackle this question in an email. Yet, I’m eager and excited to speak with you!”
She and I NEVER had any contact prior to her sending me this question.
She was simply responding to an earlier comment I made on my DAPO Community page on Facebook. In that message I wrote, “One of the hardest things to do is to ASK for HELP. One of the wisest things you can do is to ASK for HELP.”
So, she did. She asked for my help.
When she called me she gave me a brief history. She told me she had been raised in the church, read her Bible, and when she had shared her doubts about God’s existence with other believers, they shamed her for doubting.
I began by telling her I was honored that she reached out to me. I told her I believe that God can handle our doubt. That He is bigger than our doubts, fears, and questions.
As I listened to her, I began to understand why she doubted. She had lost so many dear family members–all of whom believed in Jesus and had accepted Him as Lord and Savior. She said they knew without a doubt where they were going when they died. And, as a 54-year old woman, she had her doubts about God. She went on to say “I can’t discuss this with family or friends because they can’t conceive of someone not believing in God.” She proceeded to say, “I go to bed terrified thinking one day I’ll close my eyes and then there will be nothing.”
I knew this was a pivotal moment for both of us.
I suggested that we pray first. We did. Then, I went on to say, “I’m not a theologian, biblical scholar, nor have I attended divinity school. I’m just a woman who struggles to do this thing called ‘life,’ like everyone else.”
I told her that I too once had my doubts. I proceeded to tell her I was a broken woman who struggled with many addictions over the years. I told her I met Jesus when I was in the pit of hell. I also told her that I did not believe our connecting today was a ‘chance’ meeting. I believe it was God nudging her to reach out to me.
Why me ? I have no idea.
The only explanation I can offer is every day I pray one simple prayer: “God use me today.” And, this was my opportunity to share what He has done and continues to do for me.
We went on to talk for over an hour and a half.
I challenged her to ask this one simple question every day for a week: “God, if you are who others say you are, would you show yourself real to me this week ?”
You see, it’s not my job to convince her, or any one for that matter, that God exists.
My job was to simply hold a safe place for her to express her doubts, pray with her, and share what Jesus has done for me. The rest is up to Him.
So, there’s no need to make it complicated. If you doubt the existence of God today, simply ask God every day for one week to make Himself real in your life. Then, wait. Be open. And, watch God do what only He can do.
I don’t know what God will do in her life this week. I do know that He will move, as only He can.
I don’t know what He will do in your life when you pray this simple prayer. If you dare to ask, I believe He will answer.
She and I agreed to speak again next Monday to see what God does. I’m believing Him for miracles.